Keep your head up: Breakups, betrayals and bummers

By Claire Convis
Deputy Editor

Valentine’s day has come and gone, but not every college student is in a mushy-gushy mood. Many students are dealing with loss, breakups, and falling outs. The stressors of personal life can take a serious toll on a student’s academic life, and more importantly, their mental and emotional health.

Arnett Chisholm is a professional counselor who has worked at WCC for over 31 years. Chisholm advises students to take advantage of the free counseling sessions offered to students if they’re feeling stressed or just need someone to talk to.

“First of all we just kinda talk to them and let them get everything out that they’re experiencing, and then what probably what I would try to do is see what kind of things make them happy,” said Chisholm.

Tapping into hobbies or spending time with loved ones can help to reduce stress, said Chisholm, citing “…hanging out with friends, listening to music, or reading a good book,” as examples.

“If they’re having romantic issues, then that affects their academic progress.” Chisholm said. “Some are just having academic issues because of a death in the family, an illness in the family, or something along those lines.”

Chisholm said that WCC students are entitled to eight free counseling sessions per semester.

“We try to let them know that this is a safe place, it’s confidential,” said Chisholm. “They can feel safe that we aren’t talking about their issues to other people, so they can disclose anything they like.”

The only case where the counselors would have to alert someone else of a confidential conversation would be if a student disclosed a desire to harm themselves or someone else.

WCC students also contributed their own ideas for getting through an emotionally rough patch, such as losing a friend or breaking up with a romantic partner.

Madalyn Jaynes, an 18 year old elementary education major, says that it’s still important to be nice to those who have wronged you. “Don’t be spiteful… no matter how mad you are,” said Jaynes.

WCC education major Alison Gray is 18 years old and said that it’s key to keep your problems in perspective. “You have to keep going,” said Gray. “Just because one thing went wrong doesn’t mean that everything in the future is going to go wrong.”

Tyler Deneau is an 18 year old WTMC student who lost a friend “a while back,” and said that it’s important to be aware of your emotions during a rough time.

“You have to really work at it, and work on living with that pain, and understanding that it’s still going to be there for a long time,” said Deneau. “I used to go for runs. I would just go and sprint my emotions away. And that really helped.”

Deneau’s friend, Alexandrea Fern, also agreed that exercising can be a healthy way to cope with negative emotions. “I hike, and I workout” said Fern, a 15 year old WTMC student. “I feel like it’s really good to release those endorphins,” Fern said. “It’s important to think of how you want to be and how you want to prioritize that, to be living your best life.”

Maram Dhayef is a 19 year old criminal justice major who says it’s important to stand up for yourself and your feelings. “Don’t let others control you,” Dhayef said.

When asked what methods can help students get through a rough time, Dhayef said “Work. Study. Meet new people. Keep yourself busy all the time, and you’ll be okay. That helped me.” Dhayef also suggested staying off of social media and ceasing contact with a former romantic partner.

WCC student Asrar Osman agrees with Dhayef that it’s important to process emotions from the beginning, rather than ignoring your feelings.

“Cry it out,” said Osman, a 20 year old planning to become a dental hygienist. “Trying to hide it and everything is not going to help.”

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